Not Quite Happily Ever After
by drizzley
Summary: Hollyleaf has been living her life believing the warrior code, she's sworn herself to it, like every other warrior. So when she finds out a secret that changes who she is, how will she react to the harsh reality of the lie?


A Writing Contest entry for SoulClan, Where Lost Souls Are Found.

Prompt: _"My life has been a lie."_

1,753 words.

As soon as I read the prompt, I knew I had to write something about Hollyleaf and her brothers.

Obviously I didn't take exact quotes from the book, then I wouldn't actually be writing this. I apologize if some scenes are more off than similar, but it's been a few years since I've read the book. But, it is one of my favorites, so I did remember it enough to know that I can't be _completely_ off with many scenes.

And obviously none of the scenes are that similar, I put my own twist on what I think Hollyleaf was feeling.

Also if this wasn't obvious before, there are spoilers for those who haven't read "Long Shadows" and "Sunrise".

* * *

 _"They are not my kits!"_

Hollyleaf felt the warmth of the fire, and the blazing colors were starting to faze her. She couldn't handle the situation, and she absolutely couldn't stand to think through what her mother had just said.

She felt Jayfeather and Lionblaze's pelts prick, and she knew that they were feeling a deep shock. But Hollyleaf wasn't- why should she? It was all a dream anyway, she'd wake up soon. Then this would be an interesting story to tell, her brothers would love to hear about this dream. _I'll wake up any moment now._

Hollyleaf waited a good long moment, blocking out all outside sounds, waiting for the second she'd awake from her dream. This was turning out to be an unusually long dream, was she going to wake up late?

"We're _not_?" Hollyleaf had lived with Lionblaze all her life, and never before had she heard him speak like that. His voice was soft, yet it sounded as if he was yelling. The shock and pain in his voice was clear, and she saw her mother's eyes fill with grief. What was happening to her family?

"No, I'm sorry," Squirrelflight murmured, sounding as if someone had stabbed her heart.

"What do you mean _you're sorry_?" Jayfeather snapped, his eyes blazing brighter than the fire itself.

That's when it hit her- this wasn't a dream.

And Squirrelflight _wasn't_ her mother.

"I see," Ashfur hissed. "So you've been lying to your family, haven't you? Just like you lied to me, I actually feel bad for them. So you're not their mother, you've been lying to them _their entire life_? Does Brambleclaw know?"

Silence greeted his words, and Hollyleaf felt as if she was sick. Her stomach didn't feel right, and she felt as if she would faint any second.

"I understand now." Ashfur's voice was cold and menacing. "I understand how horrible you really are. So no one except the mother knows, right?"

More silence.

"Who _is_ the mother?"

"That's not for you to know," Squirrelflight responded, her eyes set on the log that Hollyleaf and her brothers needed to cross.

"If you truly do not care for them as you said, then they can go." Ashfur stepped off the log, leaving the path clear. "But don't think for a second that you're getting away with any of this! Next gathering, I'm sure the other Clans will love to hear what I have to tell them." And with that, Ashfur ran through a bush, and disappeared from sight.

"Is it true?" Hollyleaf's voice was a low whisper, emotions piling up inside of her. _It can't be true. It was just a lie that Squirrelflight told to save us, she loves us, she's our mother. She has to be._

"I'm so sorry." The pain in Squirrelflight's voice was clear.

" _Sorry_? No, don't try to apologize, we've been living in a lie!" Lionblaze snapped, fury in his eyes.

The warmth of the fire was getting to Hollyleaf, but she couldn't bring herself to move. She couldn't bring herself to leave the harsh flames that surrounded her. "So everything you said was true?" She couldn't believe it. She didn't want to believe it.

"Yes." The softness of Squirrelflight's voice reminded her of her kithood. "But don't think for a second that I don't love you just because you aren't my kits. I _raised_ you, I love you all dearly, and I am beyond proud of who you all are right now."

"I don't want to hear it!"

"How _could_ you?"

Hollyleaf didn't want to hear her brothers yell about something that couldn't be changed- the truth was the truth. She shakily made her way across the log, and jumped off safely. She didn't bother to hide the emotion in her voice when she asked, "Who is our mother?"

"You shouldn't know," Squirrelflight told her. "But believe you when I say that she loves you very much."

"Your words are meaningless to us," Jayfeather hissed.

"I know that you must think I'm awful, and that you hate me right now. But you must believe me, I love you like if you were my own kits-"

"But we're _not_ your kits!" Lionblaze cut in. "You're not our mother!"

Squirrelflight looked as if she couldn't bring herself to respond, and she padded away without a word.

Hollyleaf couldn't bring herself to fully comprehend what had happened. It wasn't real. _But it is_ , a voice inside of her breathed. _And you've been living your entire life, believing a lie._

* * *

Hollyleaf was sitting in camp, deep in thought. She wasn't curious as to what was happening in camp, nor did she care. How could she when she just found out that her mother wasn't actually her mother not long ago? It wasn't something easy to think about, but she needed to, otherwise it would be haunting her thoughts every moment of her life.

She couldn't help but wonder who her actual mother was. _Squirrelflight may not be related to me, but I think I know her well enough to know that she wouldn't take just a random cat's kits, it would have to be a friend of hers. Is my mother in the Clans? Do I know her? Even if I don't, I don't want to. If she loved me, she'd take care of me herself! No good mother would give her kits away._

"Hollyleaf." She looked up to see Jayfeather standing there. "You, Lionblaze, and I need to talk." Hollyleaf immediately assumed it was either about Squirrelflight's lie or the prophecy. Or both, there was no way to know.

"Of course," she responded, standing up.

* * *

"What are you _saying_!"

"I'm saying that we're not in the prophecy!" Jayfeather snapped. "We would need to be the kin of Firestar's kin, but we're not! If Squirrelflight isn't our mother, then we're not actually part of the prophecy."

"I-I can't believe…" Lionblaze whispered. "So everything is gone now? Our family, the prophecy? The prophecy we've worked practically all our lives on?"

"We're just regular warriors," Hollyleaf muttered. "Ordinary. Nothing special about any of us. Except Jayfeather being a medicine cat, I suppose."

"Being a medicine cat doesn't make me special. When I'm dead, once everyone alive now is gone too, no one will remember me. Who would pass down my name?"

"So none of us matter," Hollyleaf stated flatly.

"That's not true!" Lionblaze protested. "Just because we're not part of a prophecy doesn't mean we're not special. And Jayfeather, being a medicine cat is special! You have a special connection with StarClan, you save lives, how is that not special? And Hollyleaf, one day you and I will be leader and deputy. We are special! We don't need a prophecy to prove that."

Hollyleaf had to be honest, Lionblaze's optimism was exactly what she needed right now.

"You're right," she purred. "We're just as important as we were before."

"Yeah, sure. But what about Ashfur? He's going to tell all of the Clans about us, what will everyone think?" Jayfeather cut in.

"We can't let him!" Hollyleaf hissed.

"I don't see how we can stop him," Lionblaze sighed.

"What if I could talk him out of it?" Jayfeather suggested, though it was obvious he didn't think it would actually work.

"You think that you can?"

"It's worth a shot."

"You should give it a try," Hollyleaf agreed. But she knew that Ashfur wouldn't listen to reason- he was blinded by his bitterness. Nothing mattered to him anymore, he was psychotic, that was plain to see. Talking would never work, and Hollyleaf knew it.

* * *

"Hollyleaf, did you hear about the sunhigh patrol? Ashfur is dead! They found his body!" Cinderheart told her in a hurry.

"They _did_?"

"Yes, come and see!"

Hollyleaf followed Cinderheart, of course. She needed to act like she was concerned. But the truth was, she already knew that Ashfur was dead. She was the first one to know.

Her Clanmates were all gathered around Ashfur's body, but Hollyleaf didn't need to come and get a good look. She didn't want to- she didn't need to take a look at the cuts she made. No, she wasn't proud of herself, but she felt no remorse. Why should she? Ashfur was a selfish, psychotic, cat. He was going to reveal Squirrelflight's secret and ruin her and her siblings, and Brambleclaw as well. Brambleclaw was innocent, he deserved no punishment for being a good father.

"Can you believe…?"

"Oh no…"

"What could've happened?"

Hollyleaf didn't want to hear her Clanmates talk about it, but she couldn't bring herself away from their conversations.

"What's going on?"

When Hollyleaf saw the pure shock on Firestar's face, she knew that though she had a reason, she'd done wrong.

* * *

"Tell me, why did you kill Ashfur?"

Wonderful. She'd been discovered, and by the medicine cat, her former mentor, of all people! Not only that, but Squirrelflight's sister. But Hollyleaf knew Leafpool well enough to know that she wouldn't rat her out. Leafpool deserved to know the truth, her sister was a liar, surely Leafpool should know of her own sister's lie?

"Because he was going to reveal Squirrelflight's secret!" Hollyleaf cried. "Squirrelflight isn't my mother, my entire life has been lies!"

"Hollyleaf," Leafpool whispered. "I _am_ your mother."

* * *

Hollyleaf was scared. She was beyond scared- but she knew she had to do it. The Clans needed to know. She was the daughter of a WindClan warrior and a medicine cat- she was _nothing_. Hollyleaf had killed, and her own birth was against the code she had sworn to when she became a warrior. So the least she could do was reveal Squirrelflight and her excuse for a mother's secret.

The Clan leaders had just started talking- but she needed to get her word in.

"I have something I need to say!" Hollyleaf called up to Firestar.

"If you had something to say, you should've discussed this with me beforehand. Now it can wait until-."

"No it _can't_. It's important- I need to say this now," Hollyleaf told him.

Firestar looked doubtful, but merely nodded. "Very well."

 _Should you really do this?_ A voice asked her. _Should you ruin you and your siblings? Leafpool, Squirrelflight? Should you really do this?_ Hollyleaf took in a deep breath. _My life has been a lie. What do I have left to lose?_

"Cats of the Clans, Squirrelflight and Brambleclaw are not my parents! My parents are Leafpool of ThunderClan, and Crowfeather of WindClan!"


End file.
